I went out to get a cup of java in Java and ended up on an infernal coffee odyssey through the Indonesian archipelago. Stretching out like a Komodo Dragon some 6,400 kilometers across the Ring of Fire, from the coffee plantations and wild orangutans of Sumatra to the primary rainforests and decorative penis gourds of Irian Jaya, Indonesia is the ideal launching pad to crash land into some of the most dramatic sights in Southeast Asia. … [Read more...]
How to Brave the Budapest Baths
Spa guy John M. Edwards feels frigging fantastic! If you're in Magyarorstag (Hungary), do as the Daubians do: Say goodbye to "bliss" and splash around au Naturale in the "eau de vie" of a real thermal spa, with a Red Bull in Hand... When you first arrive in Budapest for both (clandestine) “business and pleasure”-- feeling like a dumb foreign doppelganger soaking with sweat and stinking of brimstone--say no to the Four Seasons Hotel showers and … [Read more...]
I Left my Box in San Francisco
Chocolate lover John M. Edwards muses over why the travel magazine "trips" went out of business in San Francisco, apparently because of a typo, as well as some other funny ass shit. In Haight-Ashbury, once the center of the 1960s Hippy Flower Power Movement, I came upon a hawker selling unique chicken-claw pipes. I purchased one and held it up in the light as he passed me a tape of Ry Cooder, the famous slide guitarist who taught Keith … [Read more...]
The New Alchemists of Prague
Prague Spring Break: Bohemian Rhapsody or Bozo Nightmare? The Unbearable Lightness of Being a Time Traveler in Prague In a possessed city Kafka called “a mother with claws,” John M. Edwards discovers the unbearable lightness of being a tourist in overcrowded Prague. Here a cost comparison of Communist and Capitalist Prague reveals a long history of alchemy and occupation, sorcery and intrigue, apparatchik chic and uneasy redemption. Welcome … [Read more...]
Cock-a-Doodle-Don’t, Cockfighting in the Philippines
John M. Edwards attends a horrific “cockfight” on Bantayan Island in the Philippines, only to end up wondering what exactly were the ingredients in the national dish of adobo. . . . The roosters swaggered around like Mick and Keith, with dangerously sharp spurs attached to their legs. While the apocalyptic poultry sussed each other out with malice, the excitement began to build. My two new Norwegian backpacker friends snapped photos with … [Read more...]
Brr-cold in Barbes-Rochechouart: Christmas in France
In Paris’s Muslim quarter, Barbés Rochechouart, John M. Edwards finds ho-hum Christmas cheer, but no champagne or beer. . . . Back when I lived in Paris, one of the most comically incongruous things I saw as a temporary expat was a pathetic Pere Noel with a guelle de bois (“face of wood” = hangover) peeing in the snow, with an excessively painful grin, on the legendary Boulevard St. Germain (namedropped ad infinitum in Hemingway’s elegy to the … [Read more...]
Please Pass the Pommes Frites: My Dinner with Martin Amis’s Son
Ex-expat John M. Edwards is invited as a “standby” to a sumptuous Parisian dinner party near Passy, where perforce playing the devil’s advocate comes with no pricetag at all. . . . “Hello John, how would you like to come to a dinner party tonight,” queried fair friend and picnic partner Julie, a fellow Servas member. A world peace organization affiliated with the United Nations, “Servas,” we joked with devil-may-care abandon, should … [Read more...]
Waltzing through the Kaffehaus Kultura Vienna
“The [Café] Central is a place for people who have to kill time, so as not to be killed by it. . . .” --Alfred Polgar “I AM SIGMUND SPIELBERG!!!” The obviously unemployable flaneur with umlaut eyes landed at my marble-topped table without a proper invite, brusquely pushing aside a Thonet wooden chair. Brandishing a copy of Der Spiegel on a wooden rolling pin in his left hand, and reeking from an unfortunate cologne resembling turning … [Read more...]
Investigating Legendary Party Thrower Jim Haynes
It was through my fellow American expat friend, “The Famous Zack,” a black Christian science-fiction writer originally from Ohio, with a short story coming up back then in the now-defunct “AMAZING STORIES,” that I first heard about the wild parties thrown by the legendary Jim Haynes, whom some sour-grape artists deemed an apocryphal “traitor.” So well known was Haynes as a manic socialite host that he even felt propelled to write a … [Read more...]
Tips for Being in Kuala Lumpur During Ramadan
Malaysia is a predominately Muslim country. During the month of Ramadan (usually in August), devout Muslims fast during the day, say several prayers and then break their fast with a special evening meal. This important time of year is regarded as one of the Five Pillars of Islam and it begins with the crescent moon phase. Fasting is obligatory for Muslims, with the exception of pregnant women, the ill, children or diabetics. From sunrise to … [Read more...]